The past few days seem to have been blurring together more so than usual, I definitely don't sense the passing of time as I once did. Usually I feel like my head is spinning but lately, if I could use a poor analogy, it feels like I can't get my head above water, as if my thoughts can't settle and my mind won't be made. For instance I still haven't really reconciled the fact that its summer let alone the fact that summer is close to over. A lot of people will tell me I feel this way because "we haven't really had a summer this year" but its more than that. Its unnatural and I don't like it. I can remember feeling the same way last year but its worse this year which can only mean that I'm sinking deeper into whatever this is.
Today I planned on making good use of my day off work and being productive. I wanted to clean the house finally and get rid of this mess we made before Jordan's trip but I've put it off again. I also wanted to do a bit of work in my workbook and start my journal again but instead I've spent all day lazing, lounging and loafing. And eating. I really can't complain about my appetite lately, just wish I had the motivation to work out so I could put all these calories to use. Getting in shape was/is on my list of things to do this summer. To quote my betrothed, "time got in the way." I used to think that was a poor excuse for not doing things, I never used to be this lazy. Which again, confirms my belief I'm getting worse, not better.
Lately I've begun to realize that no one in the world really knows anything, not really anyways. I'm not talking about perception, that's something else altogether. What I'm talking about is people (usually ones in a position of authority or those who feel elevated above the rest of us) talk and act like
they know something for sure. Since they're the ones in power or the ones that should know the answer, they speak from that position as if their answer is iron-clad. Examples you cry?! My GM from Toronto visited me yesterday and I asked why the new SAS codes don't work and he said with a flourish of confidence that I had to enter them in a different field. I did it right in front of him and of course it didn't work. Later that day and since then I've been wondering why people think they know the answers to anything. I'm not speaking about this philosophically by the way, I'm speaking about general knowledge and everyday "wisdoms," not big important life answers. Its sort of like the following: people have vague knowledge about every day events and people and places etc. You hear a piece on the news about a bombing in Iraq and the next day at work you have a gem of information to share with your co-workers and suddenly you're the expert on the matter. To speak with any real confidence about a subject you'd have to be a scholar or have spent a lot of time researching it. Reading an article in Time magazine might be interesting but not only can you not believe everything you read, you have to consider that the article may not be telling you everything there is to know. Here's my contribution to it: I think it must be part of our genetics, part of our society to want to share information, to gossip and be heard and to speak. Why do I think this? Because I vaguely remember reading something about it somewhere at some time or another. I've noticed it before but lately its been bothering me. From now on I'm going to try to be a little less vocal during certain conversations and stay a little more reserved. I've always been sensitive of my "know-it-allism" so I'm going to do something about it. I'm going to cross it off my 'list of character flaws to correct.'
So maybe today wasn't a complete write-off, I did accomplish something after all. Or maybe I'm just exaggerating to make myself feel better for not having done anything with my time. I have a lot more to write but the Fire Cats are assembling at the F
ire Cat Cave.
Today I planned on making good use of my day off work and being productive. I wanted to clean the house finally and get rid of this mess we made before Jordan's trip but I've put it off again. I also wanted to do a bit of work in my workbook and start my journal again but instead I've spent all day lazing, lounging and loafing. And eating. I really can't complain about my appetite lately, just wish I had the motivation to work out so I could put all these calories to use. Getting in shape was/is on my list of things to do this summer. To quote my betrothed, "time got in the way." I used to think that was a poor excuse for not doing things, I never used to be this lazy. Which again, confirms my belief I'm getting worse, not better.
Lately I've begun to realize that no one in the world really knows anything, not really anyways. I'm not talking about perception, that's something else altogether. What I'm talking about is people (usually ones in a position of authority or those who feel elevated above the rest of us) talk and act like
they know something for sure. Since they're the ones in power or the ones that should know the answer, they speak from that position as if their answer is iron-clad. Examples you cry?! My GM from Toronto visited me yesterday and I asked why the new SAS codes don't work and he said with a flourish of confidence that I had to enter them in a different field. I did it right in front of him and of course it didn't work. Later that day and since then I've been wondering why people think they know the answers to anything. I'm not speaking about this philosophically by the way, I'm speaking about general knowledge and everyday "wisdoms," not big important life answers. Its sort of like the following: people have vague knowledge about every day events and people and places etc. You hear a piece on the news about a bombing in Iraq and the next day at work you have a gem of information to share with your co-workers and suddenly you're the expert on the matter. To speak with any real confidence about a subject you'd have to be a scholar or have spent a lot of time researching it. Reading an article in Time magazine might be interesting but not only can you not believe everything you read, you have to consider that the article may not be telling you everything there is to know. Here's my contribution to it: I think it must be part of our genetics, part of our society to want to share information, to gossip and be heard and to speak. Why do I think this? Because I vaguely remember reading something about it somewhere at some time or another. I've noticed it before but lately its been bothering me. From now on I'm going to try to be a little less vocal during certain conversations and stay a little more reserved. I've always been sensitive of my "know-it-allism" so I'm going to do something about it. I'm going to cross it off my 'list of character flaws to correct.'So maybe today wasn't a complete write-off, I did accomplish something after all. Or maybe I'm just exaggerating to make myself feel better for not having done anything with my time. I have a lot more to write but the Fire Cats are assembling at the F
ire Cat Cave.
No comments:
Post a Comment